Friday, February 8, 2008

Height restrictions

You know you might be vertically challenged when:

  1. You are making a staff presentation to everyone and go up to the moving podium immediately after your boss and have to move it down by at least a foot.
  2. In a staff competition during the same meeting, you have to jump up when you find the answer. I got the answer but didn't jump up and yelled it out (forgive me for getting excited about a free fruit rollup!). People started heckling me and saying "She didn't stand up. She didn't stand up." Then you hear the ripple of laughter. Later on you find out that someone muttered not so silently under their breath that "She was standing. No one could see her."
  3. You wear high heeled boots for big occasions so you can get respect and look all the guys in the eye. This tends to backfire with incredibly sore feet at the end of the three or four hours on your feet.
  4. You are so disappointed when stores don't carry petite lengths... and you think about how much it would cost to get it hemmed or if your auntie or mom will be in town soon and whether they'd bring their sewing machine and hem them for you. How many times have I asked lately?
  5. In order to reach the floor when you crank your office chair up, you have to have an incredibly thick reference book on the floor so your feet don't dangle above the floor.
  6. Ten year olds start looking down on you.
  7. You have to state that you are 5'2 and a half. It helps if you emphasize the half part. It usually gets you lots of respect....
  8. Your house is well dusted... to the 5' level.
  9. One of your nicknames is Short One.
  10. Or... you come into your office and notice that the white board that you have right by your desk for brainstorming, reminders and phone messages has this line half way up with the words You must be shorter than this line to use this board. After having a good laugh, you realize that everything is in a perfect arch up to that line and that the board hasn't seen ink above the line. Brand spanking new above the line. You should see people kill themselves laughing when they come into the office.


tallmom said...

Hey all i have to say is.....
Its easier to hem pants then to add on.. being on the other end of the spectrum can be worse when it comes to clothes.

Bargainista said...

Something to look forward to as you age...People somehow think you're younger than you are just b/c you're short.
However i do have to wear turtlenecks (necks don't lie), and my hands are a dead giveaway, so i keep them moving or covered with gloves,(works great in winter).

happygeek said...

Ummm, as the very shortest of the cousins, I feel ya. I like to tell people I am 5'2" if I stand up really tall.
I am thinking that bargainista has something there on the younger thing.
Wishing you a happy Friday!